Back in the day, actually about 10 years ago, we were  looking for a private babysitter. We found one in southwest Arlington. A few doors down lived Verne Troyer, the 2-foot-8 fellow who was out of town working on the first Austin Powers movie with Mike Myers. So far, this story has no point other to let you know, in case you already didn't know, that Verne started out pretty close to here. Verne usually has success with Mike Myers. As Mini-Me, the joke was that he was a clone, a compact version of Dr. Evil. In the Love Guru, which Hollywood75001 reviews here, Verne is the butt of one sight gag after another. You can be over-parodied. At 32 inches tall, it's hard not to be typecast. But c'mon, Verne. You can do better.  

The Happening (1 hour, 31 minutes; rated R): For the past eight years, M. Night Shyamalan has been my substitute for the Twilight Zone. I've seen every Twilight Zone black-and-white TV episode and the movie, so I look forward to something Twilight Zone-esque. Every two years, M. Night serves up a Twilight Zone-esque movie. Trouble is, M. Night only comes along every two years. Sometimes he hits. Sometimes he misses.

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You're going to be seeing and hearing a lot about the Incredible Hulk in the coming days. I saw the Hulk about five years ago. It was ... eh. In fact, on future reference, and to distinguish from the Incredible Hulk, I'll call it Eh ... Hulk. The Incredible Hulk is not a sequel to Eh ... Hulk. This is a do-over. The makers of the Incredible Hulk are pretending Eh ... Hulk never happened, and if it did, it happened in a parallel universe. Eh ... Hulk was filmed in the San Francisco Bay Area. The Incredible Hulk is in the New York area. So, I guess the parallel universe premise flies in this case. Whatever, expect a lot of CGI. I was all excited because, judging from a trailer and at the end of Iron Man, it looked like Robert Downey Jr.'s character was going to take on Incredible Hulk. Now, I hear, not so much. Anyway, check out Hollywood75001's review here. 

You Don't Mess with the Zohan (1 hour, 53 minutes; Rated PG-13): So I'm watching this movie, laughing at Adam Sandler's lampooning of the Arab-Israeli struggles, and I start to feeling guilty. I'm wondering to myself: Did people also laugh at Hogan's Heroes with the suave American POWs outfoxing the bumbling Nazis? That's when I realize I'm thinking way too deep and not taking in this movie for what it really is: A Happy Madison production with a social message stuffed between rehashed Saturday Night Live sketches and crude sex jokes.

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You probably felt like you've already seen Kung Fu Panda -- what with the bazillion trailers and clips they've played on ABC programs. Hollywood 75001 says it's worth taking the kids AND staying to see it for yourself. Check his review here.