Time to get off the diet wheel: an honest look at losing the weight, keeping it off, and managing expectations about the process. 

How many years now have you said the same thing, ‘this is going to be the year I get the weight off…get healthy’. Statistics tell me a majority of Americans either want to lose weight or are currently trying.

For more than a decade, I stumbled around the diet wheel never achieving success for a sustainable period of time. Oh, I’d hit my goal weight with some diet or deprivation, and then, like Oprah, put it on again and then some. When my weight soared up over 200 pounds after having children, my embarrassment and disgust with myself increased right along with it.

So, my first question is are you ready? Truly, are you ready to do whatever it takes to accomplish this goal? Here is the reality staring at you in the mirror: the next 364 days are going to pass and you can accomplish your goal or be well on your way within that time or not? Which will it be?

If you can answer ‘yes’ that you are ready, then let’s start setting some expectations about how you can achieve your weight loss goals and better health.

Once I admitted my readiness, I quickly learned to quit making excuses. No longer did I allow my feelings to dictate if I worked out or not. My comfort no longer mattered. I got up when I was tired and worked out. I went to the gym even when I did not feel like it or faced the embarrassment of my weight. I even continued to go to a cardio class when the instructor asked me if I was pregnant. “No I am not”, I said, “just fat.” While I cried my eyes out in the car after class, I knew my health and goals were more important than my feelings.

Many times family circumstances or schedules create convenient excuses. No more! No longer do I hit a drive through for dinner. No longer do other’s feelings dictate what I eat or how much I eat. If I chose to not eat everything my hostess serves, I refused to worry about whether I hurt feelings or not. What I find is most people understand and actually envy the ability to eat clean. It’s no secret; it’s a choice you can make.

Vacations and Holidays also trigger excuses to overeat. From now on, however, Halloween to New Year’s Day is not licensed to indulge. The week you spend on the cruise ship no longer equates to giving in, giving up, or falling off the wagon. While it is okay to have some of your favorite treats, your new lifestyle maintains clean eating no matter what the date or where you are located.

Even genetics and age pose excuses. My genetics, for instance, make it difficult to lose weight and really easy to gain. That means I must work harder and eat cleaner than some others in order to achieve the same results. I can whine and complain ‘it’s not fair’ but then I’d be making an excuse. It’s actually easier to just get to work and not waste emotional energy feeling sorry for myself.

Sounds like the expectation is perfection. No. But clearly, I’m emphasizing how easily we excuse an indulgence here, take the easy way out there, and then before you know it, we’re off track and the weight packs on again.

If you find yourself in the drive thru line, okay, just pick wisely and don’t make it a regular thing. Don’t kick yourself when you indulge. Simply, get right back into your new normal lifestyle. If you spend the day depressed because your friend is thin and you are not. Stop, focus, and return to a lifestyle that supports your goals instead of emotionally spiraling out of control.

The next realization about losing weight and keeping it off resides in the fact it means working out and eating clean the rest of your life. This is not about going on some diet and getting off it. No pill will help you take off the weight and maintain it the rest of your life. Working out and eating clean is a diet plan you can implement the rest of your life.

Those two components are my normal daily routine. And the results worth it: no longer am I under the tyranny of food choices and what I weigh. Food is fuel and vitality. I no longer waste emotional energy thinking about what I ate, feeling guilty for what I did or did not do, or how I look. My confidence is stronger, my body healthier, and I face the difficulty in life with stability and perseverance.

It took me three years to lose 65 pounds. I could have accomplished that in less time, but I engaged in a different lifestyle not a diet. I took small steps at first and then continued to build upon them until, well, you now find me a professional football player for the World Champion Dallas Diamonds at 42.

If you are ready, the time is now. There may not be an immediate payoff but don’t let that be another excuse. Be intentional to do hard things outside of your comfort zone. In fact go beyond what’s expected and required. Challenge your norm and don’t settle for less than what you truly want!

Stay inspired,

Kip #45

I'll never forget sitting in Dr. Howard Hendricks Bible Study Methods class at Dallas Seminary. We took everything off our desk but a single sheet of paper and numbered 1-5. “Make a list of the greatest struggles you’ve had in life,” the wise Professor requested.

Stay inspired,

Kip #45

Cowboys Leave a Chill in the Air

Game on guys…defrost, unify, heat this place up and prove you are as the Diamonds’ say, ‘One Team…One Goal!’

Stay inspired,

“It’s just a game”, she exclaimed. “No, it’s not!” I sobbed as I took down all the signs the kids made. “We can’t make it to the National Championship now.”

I was devastated three years ago when the Longhorns came to Columbus and beat the Bucks in the Horseshoe. Screaming, pacing, yelling for Tressel to play more aggressive offense, dying when mistakes nailed our own coffin closed. I tell you, I was crying when the game was over. There were so many high hopes gone in one game. That’s when my 6-year-old daughter looked at me like a mother and said “It’s just a game, Mom.” Stick a knife in me why don’t you?

Convicted about my bad attitude, the next day I apologized to her. I told her she was right and Mommy was misguided, eh, wrong. It was just a game.

So, don’t you know, my now 9-year-old daughter said the same thing to me today as we anxiously awaited text message updates from Killeen as to the score in the State Championship game between our beloved Legacy Eagles and the Canyon Creek Cougars.

She and I were enjoying Tea at the Lavender Room with the 4^th Grade Girls Friendship Club. She was enjoying it, but I was jittery sensing a tough battle. And, it was…I found out late in the 4th quarter the Eagles were down by 10 but fighting their way back. I could not sit still. I raised my hands and yelled in this rather lady-like, posh setting, “come on Eagles, we need a touchdown.”

And, that’s when she said it. “Mom, it’s just a game, stop yelling.” The next text came in, Legacy pulled within 3. Come on…come on, I thought. I bowed my head several times in prayer.

The final text appeared. The State Championship game was over. Legacy lost 33-30. My heart sank. I could just imagine the disappointment and frustration.

Just 12 hours earlier I had the privilege to speak with the team before they loaded onto the bus to Killeen. Sharing with them the incredible honor to play this game, I conveyed football teaches us so much about character and life. No other game requires such dependency on each other for success.

And, Legacy’s success is not defined by whether or not they won the State Championship. Their success resides more in the process they walked and the character gained from their pre-season injuries, the first devastating loss, remaining undefeated in regular season play to making their State Championship debut .

QB Mark Berry told me a few weeks ago that first loss humbled the team. Humility comes before honor. Winning a District or State Title is not the true measure of these young men. They lost today. That loss does not define them. Football is not their identity. My 9-year-old daughter and, I’m glad to say, her Mom agree with Legacy Head Coach Mike Hall, “The game of football to me is strictly that…a game. It’s the life lessons we learn throughout that are important.”

Stay inspired,

Kip #45

CHRISTMAS GIFT LIST

I’ve never done this before! But, I’ve had a few requests, so here you go: my offerings for some of the best and most economically sound Christmas gifts this year.

What makes my list different than others? Well, it’s not driven by a big company marketing firm to get it on television or radio. These are items I love and have found valuable. Ok, it includes items I wish for as well…so someone send this to my husband! In addition, for the most part, the list contains stuff anyone can afford. You’ll find something cost effective for nearly everyone.

·        Innovative Technology Retro Turntable ($199.99) – As a former DJ in the 80’s and early 90’s, the ability to turn my vinyl and cassettes into cd’s and then onto my mp3 player is fantasy become reality!! This particular model includes a cd player, 3 speed turntable, cassette player, and AM/FM radio. It includes a line-in for your mp3 player! Music junkie’s dream gift!! There are other makers and models out there…this was just the most cost effective one I found at Bed Bath and Beyond.

·        Digital Photo Frames ($15 and up) – Even for the Grandparents and the ‘hard to buy for this is a ‘no-brainer’ gift. You can put all the photos you want onto a disk and taylor make it for your loved one or not so loved one.

·        Iron Gym ($29.99) – ok, I know, it is a ‘Seen on TV’ item, but I love this product. I travel with it! You can find it at a variety of stores including Target, Bed Bath Beyond, and Amazon.

·        Relevant Magazine ($14.95) – This is the best magazine for getting, maintaining, and being cultural relevant and aware…hence, the name. It speaks to a variety of ages, but it is mainly geared towards the 20-40 something year olds!

·        Clean Eating Magazine ($14.97) – This is the best investment in transforming your nutritional health. This magazine makes grocery shopping and cooking easy! Trust me that’s huge! I hate to cook, but I find this doable and easy on my busy schedule and it keeps me fit and ready for football! It includes 4 weeks of daily menus, the shopping list for those menu items, and the recipes.

·        Family Times Monthly Virtue Pack ($11.95/month) – If you have young kids, they will love this! And, the bonus lies in the fact you’re investing in their character! Each virtue pack comes with a cd which includes an upbeat story by KidJam, an original song for the ipod, and parenting tips on the virtue. You also receive note cards to give to your kids, and interactive cards you can use during dinner, bedtime, or anytime you want a family activity. Since we joined a year or so ago, we’ve learned about Cooperation, Endurance, Friendship, Generosity, Serving, Compassion, and many others! you can find out more or sign up at www.familytimes.org

·        Dallas Diamonds Season Tickets (Adult Season Tickets $40 and Children $27; Family 4-pack $130) – Of course this is on the list! This is great family entertainment at an amazing price. It fits nicely in any stocking and, come on, it curbs the curiosity of women playing tackle football!! www.dallasdiamondsfootball.com

·        Samaritans Purse ($7 - $75,000) – This organization is amazing in what they do for the hurting and needy in our world. With a small donation, you can provide a Christmas box of goodies for a young child. For minimal amounts, you can teach a child, save mothers, babies, orphans, or provide medicine, food, or clothing. Your kids can get involved by giving sports gear, stuffed animals, blankets, and more. Visit www.samaritanspurse.org to make a donation.

·        Recycled Record Coasters ($20) – For any vintage music lover, this is perfect! The cost is right too! These one-of-a-kind vinyl record coasters were created from original records. You can find them at www.ecoist.com

·        Earfun Clips ($3.99) – Being the fashion junkie I am, I love the idea of accessorizing my earphones. These are a pair of flexible rubber decorative clips that attach to my earphones! They come in three styles: peace sign, hearts, or flowers. You can find them at The Container Store. They make a great stocking stuffer for the young gal on your list…oh, wait, I’m 42…okay so they are for anyone you think would use them!

·        Frisco Thunder Season Tickets (Starting at $70) – Arena football at its finest ignites the Dr. Pepper Star Center right here in Frisco. The Thunder are owned by local residents who put together a great team and a fantastic family experience! You don’t have to go all the way to Dallas or Arlington to find great football! www.friscothunderifl.com

·        Warm Weatherfield Shoes ($19.99) – Normally, I don’t shop Landsend, but I was looking at the catalog during my daughter’s swim practice and found these shoes! Love them! They come in amazing colors from cobalt blue, orange, red, ivory, brown, and hunter. They are insulated, water-repellent, have an antimicrobial insole, and a rubber sole. www.landsend.com

·        The Winner’s Manual by Jim Tressell ($24.99 or less) – You’ve seen me blog about this book. Inside the covers yields the actual training manual Tressel gives each player who reports to The Ohio State University football program. He answers the question of ‘what does it really means to be a winner?’ It is a great read for anyone but obviously the men and young men in your life will enjoy it. The lessons and advice go beyond the football field. You can find it at any bookstore.

·        Zoom Training  ($50 and up depending on package) - Change your lifestyle by including the gift of fitness. Zoom is a place where the pros train but it is also a place you and your kids can train too! The staff at Zoom is top in their field. They have the education and experience. If the pros trust them, so can you. www.zoomsports.net They are located at Preston and Gaylord. Amy can set you up at the front desk!

• Addition:  A Massage ($45 and up depending on length and type of massage) I can't believe I forgot this one!! I know two great therapists in Frisco who have worked on my aging 40-somthing year old body to keep me in the game! You may think a massage is a luxury item, but literally, I would not be able to perform as well without them and neither can you. Massage aids in injury prevention and healing, relieves and reduces muscle soreness and tightness, decreases pain, reduces stress, and assists the immune system. Who doesn't want that? So along with the resolution to eat clean and get fit, include a massage! Chris A. at Frisco Massage Envy is a Licensed Massage Therapist and truly listens to what you need in a massage. He has years of experience with professional athletes including the Mavericks and Stars. Sammie Villarreal at We Knead Bodies is a Licensed Massage Therpist and a Medical Massage Practicion. I've had more folks tell me Sammie is the best and makes a difference! Some drive up from Carrollton to see her. She too has years of experience with professional athletes including figure, fitness, and bodybuilder competitors. As an MMP, she is also results oriented providing treatment to directly resolve conditions diagnosed by a a Physician. Visit www.wekneadbodies.com for more information on Sammie and what she provides. And, visit www.massagenvy.com for more on Chris.

·        Starbucks Gold Card ($25) – In this economic down turn, if you have family members who can’t let go of the coffee habit (of course I am not thinking of myself), this will help. This card equates to a ‘yearly membership’ in which you receive 10% off each purchase along with some other perks.

·        Team Mini Helmet ($24.99 and up) – Male or female, we all have our favorite teams, don’t we! Go Bucks! Get a mini-helmet for display, autographs, or to put on the stuffed animals and play a game! You can tell we do that at home by the mere suggestion!!

·        Journal ($3 and up) – Whether you get a drug store spiral or a nice gold leaf bound one, get a journal. Preserve your family memories, write notes to your children to give to them later, write down favorites, and/or pick a topic and write about it! There is nothing better than providing your family with some sort of history!

·        Boggle ($15 and up) – This is easiest and best game when you have a variety of ages involved. Young and old can play. And, I am pushing this one…it was created by a family member of mine! Sadly, however, I do not get any of the royalties, so don’t think I’m getting rich by pushing it. You can find it at Target, Walmart, Toys R Us, and other retailers that sell games.

·        Thank You Notes ($5 and up) – Everyone needs to get back in the habit of hand-writing a ‘thank you note’. Do not email your ‘thank you’…sit down and write it, please!

·        UnChristian by Gabe Lyons and David Kinnaman ($12 or 3 for $30) Christianity has an image problem. According to the latest report card by Barna Research, most young people use words like “hypocritical,” “insensitive,” and “judgmental.” That is unChristian. The details of the study commishioned by the Fermi Project are found in this groundbreaking book. Find out why these negative perceptions exist, how to change them in a Christ-like manner, and review some practical examples of how to positively contribute to society. You can find the book at any book store but the Fermi Project does have the best price: www.fermiproject.com/store/shop/books.aspx

·        A Whistle - ($2 and up) Ok, this one jumped on the list after watching a Mom command the attention of a crowded room tonight. She created silence and honored someone special as a result! It was a beautiful scene. Everyone Mom, teacher, coach, leader needs one of these in their stocking.

·        Restyle Gift Certificate – (name your price) This is the only women’s consignment store in Frisco located on Main Street just West of Preston Road. They have designer clothes as well as all the major mainstream labels at a fraction of the cost! This Neighborsgo favorite also has shoes, handbags, jewelry, Carriage Candles, and other accessories!

·        Justice/Limited Too – ($15 and up) If you are of reasonable size, these two places have shirts and tunics you can get for your daughter and a matching one for yourself. Several times my daughter and I purchased ‘matching’ items on our ‘special day’! We just did it with their Christmas shirts. She gets her size and I can fit into a child’s 16-18-20 depending on the style.

·        VW Beetle – (approximately $22,000) This is the best gift for the wife! She would love a red one with black interior, spoiler, and fully loaded!! Research indicates it is a very safe car, good repair rating, and great gas mileage. Quite honestly, she’s ready! She’s tired and fearful of the 10-year-old mini van with nearly 200,000 miles on it. And, clearly after two big dogs who have passed on, two kids who have grown beyond car seats, and years of football, the van is really more like a bio-hazard than a safe vehicle for the family!

Ok…that’s it!! That’s my list…hope you find something useful! Post any other great and valuable ideas you have!

Happy Holidays!!

Stay inspired,

Kip #45

Off Season Routine

Finishing week 12 of the off-season and I’m up about 10 pounds. Don’t worry, even though I’m a woman, it is all good!! The pace is tough but I’m determined to put on some mass and increase my strength while maintaining my speed such that it is. From Monday through Sunday, I’ve got a routine that keeps me busy...actually more work than during the season.

Monday, I hit the football field right after dropping my kids off at school. I do about 30 to 45 minutes of field work. Field work includes such things as cone drills, ladder drills, sprint drills, and running the stadium stairs. The goal of the field work is to increase my agility, speed, and speed endurance.

My favorite field work are ’gassers’ (HA!). Gassers are anything from six 10-yard sprints, six 30 yard sprints, followed by six 60-yard sprints to 30 endzone to endzone sprints. Gassers would be the speed endurance part aspect of field work.

Tuesday I start the day with plyometrics. This is about 20 minutes of jump rope, explosive squat jumps, lunges, and other exercises like that. I then work my biceps and triceps. I end Tuesday’s workout with a 60 minute kickboxing class.

Wednesday it is back to the football field in the morning and then I hit the gym and work my chest and abs. I finish off Wednesday by heading over to the PGA Superstore for their free beginner’s tennis class. It is an hour of learning the basics of the game, but it also provides me with a light cardio workout. Other great benefits of this tennis class for me include continued work on eye-ball coordination and agility with the feet work involved in transitioning from different strokes and different positions on the court.

Thursdays are a rest day! This is the day I get to dress up and go to work at Restyle. It is the day I’m not in workout gear and get to bring out the fashionista side of me!

Friday, it is back to work on the football field and the gym. I change up what I do at the gym depending on how I feel. Sometimes I do an hour long spin class, other times I do my final resistance workout of the week concentrating on my shoulders and legs followed by an elliptical cardio workout. Or I work my legs on the Stairmaster or do interval runs on the treadmill.

Saturday’s are usually another rest day although I am running around all day with my kids and their games!

When Sunday arrives, I figure out what I have not done and get it accomplished. Sometimes I work my shoulders and then do a cardio of some kind…treadmill, elliptical. Sometimes it is just cardio and sometimes it is heading to the field with teammates running routes, throwing the ball, covering receivers, and other ball type drills. Yeah, that’s how I broke my finger.

Generally, however,  we do some conditioning work on Sunday. ‘Suicides’ are another favorite…running to a cone and back…running to the next cone and back…then running to the final cone and back. Resting about 30 seconds and doing it again…and again…and again!

Soon, I'll head back to Zoom for some focused agility and speed training. I see this as a weakness for me and I want to improve. Chris and John over at this sports performance training center in the heart of Frisco are amazing trainers and helped me last pre-season to gain better agility. I will return to their coaching to push me to the next level. 

Of Course, the other big key to the off-season is diet. Again, as you’ve read in previous blogs, 80% of having the kind of body you want is diet. This is no different. All this work I am doing is absolutely no good unless my diet is supporting it. So, I eat pretty clean throughout the week. I’ve increased my protein intake and eat at key times throughout the day to support my workouts and goals. I do allow myself a ‘cheat’ meal each week. And, I can’t wait for it this week. I am heading to my favorite restaurant with my dear mentor, Cathy. Cathy and Grand Luxe Café…a sweet combination!

Stay inspired,

Kip #45

Now You Have to Live the Rest of Your Life, Part IV

Beliefs Inventory, Part II 

I left you last time with a challenge: to consider the most needed change in your life towards a healthy body and lifestyle is your belief system. It is NOT your circumstances, genetics, job, the number on the scale, or the removal of the most difficult person in your life that will lead to maintaining long term the kind of body you want. You need change you can sustain for a lifetime. You see, you have to spend the rest of your life NOT on a diet, around difficult circumstances with the genetics God gave you. So what needs to change in order for you to sustain this new lifestyle in the midst of difficulty? The root change takes place in your beliefs.

Remember behind ‘what we do’ in thought or action is ‘why we do it’…motives. Motives are powerful tools in our hearts that generate us to think and do. Generally, most of us are not aware of the motives that trigger us to make unwise and poor choices towards our healthy lifestyle goal. Thus, we need to do a Beliefs Inventory, a discovery process that enables us to be more aware of what drives us.

The first step to discover your motives is to ask yourself some questions around the ‘problematic’ situations and circumstances in your life during the time you’ve been struggling with weight/obesity/body and food related issues:

•         Describe the biggest struggles in life? Write about the most difficult problems?

•         What financial problems exist?

•         What are the relationship struggles I am experiencing in life?

•         Describe any career stress

•         Describe any parenting stress

•         Describe any relationship stress and/or family stress

•         Describe what addictions you think fight with

•         Describe what produces anxieties and fear

•         Describe any sexual struggles

•         What is my Self-talk like? Do I consistently berate myself? What do I tell myself?

•         Is there any abuse going on? If so, what kind and what impact is it having on me?

•         What about ‘Old Wounds’? What are the things people have said and done in my past that linger with me?

•         When do I get preoccupied with things…person?

•         What/Who has me entangled in something I shouldn’t be? How come it is so important to have that thing or be with that person?

•         When am I tempted to make poor choices? When do I envy someone else?

•         Tell about the situations which generate difficult emotions-Pain, Hurt, Anger, Fear, Rejection, Jealousy, Despair

Now, step two, examine this list of common motives. Connect them to circumstances you wrote about above. Out to the side of each of the above bulleted questions, you should be able to list at least one motive probably more. Think about these two questions as you pick the motives that fit your circumstances….What do I really want? What am I trying to accomplish?

Pleasure

Freedom/Autonomy

Power       

Peace

Love/Intimacy

Happiness

Comfort/Relief

Significance/Reputation

Meaning

Respect/Reputation

Control

Success

Security

Self-Protection

We are discovering what motives could be producing your unhealthy thoughts and behavior? It may not be just one. Try this little quiz to see if you are understanding the concept.

1. The man who overeats at night after a stressful day at work and a nagging wife might be motivated by ___________.  Answer: Peace, Pleasure, Freedom/Autonomy, Happiness, or Comfort/Relief
2. The wife who is mortified a surprise visitor who saw her messy house is motivated by _________. Answer: Significance/Reputation, Respect, Success
3. The young woman who berates herself for failing to make a perfect score on her recent history test is probably motivated by _______. Answer: Success, Significance/Reputation, Respect, Meaning

4. The father whose children are fearful of him and whose wife is cautious around him wants _________. Answer: Power, Significance/Reputation, Success, Respect, Control

5. The woman who does not take like to initiate with people and try new things might be motivated by __________. Answer: Comfort/Relief, Peace, Significance/Reputation, Success, Self-Protection

6. The man who chafes at helping around the house might want _________. Answer: Comfort/Relief, Pleasure, Control
7. The woman who sneaks off from her family to eat in hiding might desire _________. Answer: Comfort/Relief, Love/Intimacy, Security, Control, Freedom/Autonomy
8. The Husband who eats everything his spouse cooks even though he has committed to a new lifestyle change might be motivated by ________. Answer: Peace, Security, Comfort/Relief, Pleasure, Self-Protection

9. The woman who binges and purges when an upcoming date calls ands cancels on her might desire _______. Answer: Love/Intimacy, Comfort/Relief, Control, Security

10. The man who goes out and buys a new plasma TV when he is already in debt may be motivated by _________. Answer: Pleasure, Comfort, Significance/Reputation (if he is the ‘only one without one’), Success

The third step focuses on patterns. In most of our lives, there are patterns to our struggles and problems. Hence, there are patterns to our motives which drive our thoughts, self-talk, choices, and behavior. Find the patterns to your motives!

•         Patterns of brokenness – loss, rejection

•         Patterns in relational problems – multiple divorces, more than one conflictual or distant relationship

•         Patterns in hurts/scars – abuse, depression, trauma

•         Patterns of your trials

•         Patterns in escape methods – addiction

•         Match to patterns in motives – which motives do you see over and over?

After finding the patterns in your motives, the final step involves taking ownership of the motives that rule you. In other words, from the patterns you’ve discovered, you can now see which motives may be ‘idols of your heart’. An idol is a motive you value more than doing or believing what is healthy and right. You trust in that motive to temporarily give you what you want. It satisfies you even though there are difficult, unhealthy, and/or negative consequences. For example, the woman who sneaks off to eat in hiding is willing to satisfy her motive of pleasure through food even though she is overweight, has some health concerns, lies to her husband, and neglects her family to do it.

So, discover, examine, take ownership of your motives. Ask yourself if your motive(s) have become idols.

•         Comfort/Easy – Would I rather take a pill to lose weight or discipline my eating and exercise nearly everyday to live a healthy productive life?

•         Love/Peace – Would I rather eat something unhealthy and consume what is served rather than risk hurting the feelings of my spouse and teach her about my new commitment to health?

•         Pleasure – Would I rather eat past full and have seconds of the Thanksgiving Meal or consider each meal one that provides energy for my new healthy lifestyle and stop when I’m satisfied?

You don’t have to be a counselor like me to see people enslaved to food, diet programs, pills, sex, TV, shopping, and sleep due to the idols of comfort and pleasure. Many folks are in serious consumer debt due to the same motives. I had one client tell me her 50 thousands dollars of debt was no big deal. She would simply file bankruptcy and get out of paying. What’s wrong with that, she asked? Please tell me I don’t have to answer that question. She definitely had the idols of pleasure and comfort.

The key here is to realize the food is not the problematic issue. It’s not the debt that is the root of the problem. It is the motive(s) that has become idols. There is never enough food to satisfy. There are never enough clothes or household décor or gadgets to satisfy. There is a constant desire for more built into human nature. So, again, it is not the object of desire, it is the desire itself which requires our attention.

This is heavy stuff! When you talk about and examine beliefs it touches all areas of your life not just trying to have a healthy body. So, now that you obtained more awareness of yourself and what motivates you, you’ll begin to see it next time you decide to overindulge. You will find yourself cognitively having to make a choice between wise and unwise. Coming up, I will show you how to apply the new knowledge you’ve gained into your daily routine.

Stay inspired,

Kip #45

Step 4: Examine your Motives: Beliefs Inventory

So far we’ve looked at 3 Basic Principles to a healthy lifestyle. All are COMMON SENSE BUT NOT COMMON PRACTICE: eating clean and hydrating with water, exercising on a daily basis, and getting enough rest.

This final principle is common sense like the others, but most of us don’t bother to do it. We would rather take a pill to make it easy to lose the weight than spend time examining what beliefs and motives are responsible for our obesity or unhealthy body.

The reality is our public actions tell a story about the private intentions inside our hearts. Chances are you’ve considered some ‘whys’ and ‘how comes’ of your behavior. Many of you may sense that things are not okay with your behavior whether that’s related to eating and body shape or otherwise. The truth is behind ‘what we do’ is ‘why we do it’…our motives!

Thus, your most needed change is not circumstances, situation, weight, relationships, or genetics. Your most needed change to achieve a healthy lifestyle is your belief system.

When considering a Beliefs Inventory, your motives are important to examine. For those of you struggling with food issues and addiction, the negative thought patterns and compulsive behavior may seem automatic with an inability to control them. It is an obsessive situation. Even asking ‘why’ may seem silly.

Yet, the #1 reason we do NOT change and stay stuck in self-destructive behavior is we really do NOT want to change. The behavior and thought patterns gives us something we want and meet our chosen needs! Behind the behavior and thoughts are the desires we volunteer to be enslaved to. So, again, our motives and belief system must be revealed if we want to change our lifestyle.

Consider this: continued gluttony, overeating, sloppy eating, or a binge/purge cycle provides something you want such as comfort, control, pleasure, power, revenge, temporary freedom from pain, etc. On some level, you are willing to live with the negative consequences of these behaviors because it provides you with the desires of our heart. It fulfills what motivates you whether that is comfort and pleasure or even security and revenge.

For example, the man who overeats at night after a stressful day at work and a nagging wife might be motivated by comfort, peace, or pleasure. The daughter who eats everything her mother cooks, even though she has committed to a new healthy lifestyle, might be motivated by fear, self-protection, or peace. The mother who repeatedly gets fast food for her family might be motivated by ease, comfort, and pleasure.

Most of us do not take the time to truly examine what motivates us to behave in ways that damages us. The desire for comfort and ease is not wrong, but when you find yourself obese, overweight, or caught up in an unhealthy cycle due to those motives, then they are a problem. When you are willing to overeat at night and pack on the pounds, then the desire for comfort is wrong. When you would rather eat something unhealthy or eat all that is served you by mom rather than risk hurting her feelings, then you’ve made the desire for peace and self-protection more important than living a healthy lifestyle. When you would rather enjoy that birthday cake, Thanksgiving Meal or vacation food past the point of satiety then you’ve chosen pleasure over common sense which tells you to stop. That’s when the motive for pleasure is wrong. That’s when the motive ‘rules you’ and needs to be examined and changed.

Next time, I will walk you through how to do a Beliefs Inventory…the step by step process to discover what motives may be ruling your life and what to do about it.

(And, if somone doesn't call me on the time of this post, then...well, as you can see, I'm still struggling with the 'rest' principle!)

Stay inspired,

Kip #45

Local Examples make the Point!

I saw this point over and over myself this weekend at all levels of football! Beginning Friday night, the LCA Eagles with a narrow lead of 28-20 held off a tough Rockwall Christian team for 8 downs at the end of the 4^th Quarter. Over and over near and in the red zone this LCA defense kept Rockwall from scoring. There was no reason why Rockwall should not have converted. They had 8 shots at it.

Rockwall even put up 225 passing yards to Legacy’s 86 during this game. The reason Legacy won the game: DEFENSE! LCA held on to win the game 28-20.

And, you might not know this, but LCA has the best record of any high school varsity football team in Frisco. They are Division Champions. And, can I just say, I am so proud of these guys. I was there at the first game of the season and worry set in as they did not look very good at all. That loss was the only one! These guys united, worked hard, listened to their Coaches, and they deserve some recognition for their efforts!

Let’s go to Saturday…Frisco Football League 7-year-old Colts dominated the Saints. They played they way they practiced by excellent offensive execution and defense that did not let up.

This pee-wee football team is ranked #1 in defense and #1 in offense for their division. But, check this out…this team in their first year of playing tackle football is ranked #1 in defense in all of FFL. They tied with the 9-year-old Gators for this honor. Both the Colts and the Gators only allowed 12 points scored against them during regular season play.

These little guys have been Coached well on this principle of defense winning football games. They understand stopping the run and not allowing anyone to the outside.

Sunday, the rookies and veterans of the Dallas Cowboys united defensively with some better energy and better execution to win the game 13-9. We all know the offense was struggling and the Boys lost most of their first string secondary. So, the question was out there…can these young players without any or much experience get the job done?

The Buccaneers final drive against the nickel defense included these guys who would not normally be there. And, what happened? This ‘newbie’ defense got it done enough to hold on to the small lead for victory. Now granted, we did not see many fades or deep passes to really challenge the Corners, but the young DB’s were put to the test and managed to secure a win. Garcia, I don’t think, found too many opportunities deep. And, with the majority of short passes delivered, the young Cowboys defense made the stops necessary. And, one more thing, it was nice to see former Buckeye Bobby Carpenter recover a fumble! Awesome!

All that said, I still have to make a quick comment on the Diamonds. It wouldn’t be right without a mention. Go back to the Diamonds Championship Victory over Chicago. We had an amazing goal line stand that enabled us to stay in this game and win in overtime. That ‘wall’ was not penetrated. The Force could not score at the goal line…not up the middle and not on the outside. Diamonds win!

I understand the Championship DVD should be out soon at www.iwflsports.com. Yeah, kinda late, but better late than never.

Stay inspired,

Kip #45 

Sleep is a necessary component for the body to recover from all the hard work you are doing. In fact, no sleep = no healthy body or mind. And, scientists will tell you that if you are struggling to sleep, exercise is a great way to naturally induce sleep. At the end of your hectic day from weight training to your job and family obligations, you should feel a normal ‘tiredness’ and sleep should come very naturally to you. This the body’s way of speaking to you. Muscle tissue repair and recuperation comes during sleep.

Another important reason for sleep is the Human Growth Hormone (HGH) rises during deep sleep. The HGH is an amino acid produced by the pituitary gland. It has an important role in our skeletal development in our early years and continues to regulate our metabolism during our lifecycle. So, no sleep = messed up metabolism.

Now, having said all that, we all know each one of us has a unique sleep cycle and unique sleep needs. Most of us, however, need 6-12 hours of sleep each night. Yes, that is a broad range. If you consistently wake up after 6 hours of sleep and feel rested, then perhaps 6 hours is all you need. I know, for instance, I need around 7 to 8 hours of sleep to feel renewed. Any less than that and I am a sluggard and I can tell my body has not fully recovered from all the hard work I did the day before.

If you absolutely stay up too late, then try taking a 20 minute nap sometime during the next day. Some say a 20 minute daytime nap is the equivalent of 2 hours of nighttime sleep. I’m not sure I believe that, but one source I checked out said it’s true. And, I had a ‘second’ on that from my husband who actually put a couch in his conference room at work for naps. He says he needs his 20 minute nap everyday to be productive. And, he allows his employees to do the same! Now there’s a great employee benefit!

Maybe for you, rest is not the hard principle…maybe it is the clean eating…or exercise. For me, rest is hard. I am a night owl by nature. I feel the most productive around 9pm to 2:00am. But, my life starts early with two kids, workouts, and household management. This school year, I vowed to get to bed by 11:00pm. Most of the time, I have made it. I’ll get nestled in around 10:45 after prepping for the next morning. I read for about 15 minutes, then lights out.

Recently, however, it has been more like midnight or 12:30am. You’ll see posts from me around that hour. I keep thinking ‘I can get one more thing done.’ But, I suffer because of that choice. I can tell that lost hour to hour and a half makes a difference. I am less energetic and more irritable. I am less motivated and more ‘going through the motions’.

So, if you see a post from me past the 11:30pm mark, then call me out! It’s time for me to get back to 11:00pm!!

Stay inspired,

Kip #45